Is the Remote Control within your power?

Children’s responsible TV viewing will largely depend on parents.

The questions is for you, dear parents and guardians of kids below 10 years old, who rarely “get hold” of the remote control during TV viewing at home.

Who’s in charge?

Mock survey reveal that parents are either out of the picture or they are there – not necessarily watching TV with their kids – but are busy doing something else. If they, too, are fans of some casts in daily ‘soaps’ or other TV shows, it is often the children’s liberty and pleasure to “hold” the remote control. They flip, they zap…choosing what they like and just picking what pleases them. If tolerance is not the name of the game – then, could this be sheer ignorance or lack of awareness? This is why the question is by all means addressed to some of our parents today: ‘Do you have the last “say” with regards to the TV content and viewing habits of your children?’ “Do you get them to understand the value of responsible TV viewing?’

Some parent might brush-off the idea of “TV viewing” as a potential problem, acutely aware that i-pods, mp3s and SMS, in particular, are now grabbing the attention of many children today. True, teeny-boppers and een little kids have now found new diversions in these. But doesn’t television continue to occupy a prominent place in homes today?

Children are multi-tasks experts. They can listen to music, read their books, send text messages and watch TV all at the same time – and with equal interest, too. But even as they do that, the impact of television which is predominantly visual, could certainly leave a lasting imprint in their psyche. Why? Because communication theory tell us that the eyes are more strongly impressed than the ears. In fact, we learn_83% just using our eyes. Whereas, we learn much less (11%) if we use our ears, comparatively. The same holds true with retention. We retain 30% of what is “seen only” as against the 20% retention of what is “heard only”. Yes, visual stimuli have more impact especially when they are in motion – and television is very rich in these. It is, therefore, imperative that we pay special attention to images that are presented on TV and to which our children are frequently exposed.

Proper use of television

Note that television can be a good “formator”, but a contingent “de-formator” as well, depending on how we use this medium. If TV programs become a source of information, increase knowledge, family and fraternal bondings, faith experiences, cultural and social awareness and other positive benefits – then we are assured that TV is properly used. If, on the one hand, TV shows or programs give rise to perversion, anti-social behaviours of children, disintegration of families, displacement effect, nutritional imbalance attention deficit disorder in kids, etc., then, most likely, it is Television that “is using” the consumers and not the other way around.

Convinced of the power and persuasiveness of this “boob tube” as an audio-visual medium, parents are reminded now and again to “tighten their hold’ of the remote control which simply means: Discipline, morality check, media literacy education and above all ‘witnessing’ or good examples put together.

By ‘discipline’, we don’t mean getting the children to watch only this or that kind of programs – or, else No-definitely not! Like ‘Media Literacy Education’ – discipline here does not mean “inoculation”, where children are simply forewarned by their parents about certain programs so that they will be more capable of defence against negative influences. To a certain degree – admonition, giving warning, or putting on one’s guard, is prudence – a virtue that exercises sound judgement in practical matters. But inoculation alone is not enough without helping the children develop their critical thinking skills. Inoculation that is prompted only by a desire to “protect” the kids from the negative values embedded in some TV programs or other media materials, for that matter, will not always lead the children towards “critical autonomy”, or the ability to think and decide for themselves.

The goal of discipline, says Phyllis Chandler and Joan Burney, should be “to help children become ‘self-disciplining’… helping what you want them to learn, and providing the learning experience in a growth-producing manner that does not threaten their self-esteem” (Sharing the Faith with Your Child”, p. 69).

Today’s media, particularly television, continue to enjoy their dominance and power over millions of unresisting consumers – many of whom are kids. That’s why parent have to assert their rights over their children and not allow the media to take the full control of their mind, will, heart.

Tips for parents

Since children spend most of their time at home using the media, it would probably help if parents be guided in developing the critical thinking skills of their children through Family Media Literacy. Here are some tips which might help:

1.  Agree on what TV program to watch and choose “not just any” program – but program(s) that can provide intellectual, moral, psychological and spiritual growth for the child.

2.  Set the time and day of viewing and stick to the schedule as agreed upon.

3.  Alternate TV viewing with activities or games which require decision-making and lots of creativity.

4.  Watch TV with your children and discuss media content with them. Allow them to talk freely about what they think and feel about the programs.

5.  Listen attentively to what your children are saying and not saying openly, for that will help you gauge how much they can absorb from what they have seen and heard.

6.  Encourage the children to ask questions about anything that puzzles or upset them. Or, you may initiate by asking them questions about what they understood from the story or statements made, as well as the good and the ‘not-so-good’ things they have observed: why characters or hosts say this or that; how are problems solved and what solutions are given, etc.

7.  Be prepared to answer the questions of your children especially with regards to the nature, techniques used and impact of media in relation to self, others and God.

8.  Bear in mind some of the fundamental principles of media literacy – that media are constructed realities’: they use identifiable techniques to get us hooked up into them; they are businesses with commercial interest; they are value-laden and therefore, we need to discover these values together as a family. But the most important principle is that we negotiate meaning with the media.

It is tue – “no one sees media in the same way. How we consume the media is through lens of our education, our psychological and spiritual maturity and through our faith experiences”. In school, children learn the theories by heart – but easily forget them after examinations days are over. At home, the family becomes the Theory in Action.

Parents who are more advanced in age, wisdom and knowledge, are there to help their children put life and paint real colors to those theories they have learned-based on true-to-life experiences. Thus, parents have greater power in their hands. They have so much to teach their children – not by imposing – but by sharing it with them by the way they live their own beliefs – for, like the old saying: “Action speaks louder than words”. Just note, that today children don’t bother what parents say but they care a lot about what they see. In other words, children nowadays, could say: “I can’t hear what you are saying – but I can very well see what you are doing”.

9.  Give the most valuable gift to your children – your time and the love that goes with it. That’s what they need.

10.  Pray with your children. Pray as a family!

And, yes, don’t forget: Keep asking yourself this same question: “Is the remote control within my power?”